Saturday, March 7, 2015

My Brother Aaron

On February 25th I was busy. I had been running errands all afternoon and rushed to get dinner ready. All afternoon I had this nagging feeling. Just a little something bugging me that something was wrong. 
As I sat and ate dinner around 7pm I started feeling very sick. So much that I went upstairs and laid down. I wasn't sure what was going on, but something wasn't feeling right. I didn't know that at that same time my brother had had an accident.
A little after 8pm I was starting to feel better and went went down stairs, only a few minutes later my Mom BURST through my front door screaming "Aaron has been in an accident!!! He's at the hospital and they don't think he's going to make it!! He's going to die, he's going to die!!!"
I remained calm and asked what I could do. My Dad was off home teaching and Mom couldn't find him. Ryan got a hold of my Dad and told him to get home, I walked with my Mom back to her house.
 Both of my parents were devastated to say the least. My Mom was crying uncontrollably, having a total meltdown. My Dad was somber, pacing the house back and forth.
My Mom spoke frequently with Jamie, Aaron's wife who was trying desperately to get to the hospital two hours away. Aaron had been snowboarding with some friends and coworkers in northern Wisconsin. He hit his head and lost consciousness.
I knew in that moment what I needed to do. I went straight to work. I figured out what hospital Aaron was at and with the help of my bishop here I was able to get a hold of a bishop close to the hospital where Aaron was and he was able to give Aaron a blessing. Sarah went to work buying our parents plane tickets to fly to Wisconsin as soon as possible while I tried packing their bags.
I also had the horrible task of calling each of my siblings and telling the what happened and then keeping them updated.
It was a long night. At one point I asked my Dad where his coat was as I was packing for him and he couldn't even remember if he even had a coat. As we stood in his closet he picked up a tie and said "I just can't believe this, I'm probably picking out a tie to my sons funeral." The whole night I never cried. I'm not a crier to begin with, but I was just in "get things done" mode.
The hardest part was overhearing Jamie on the phone with my Mom crying  and saying "I'm not going to make it to the hospital before he dies!" I can't imagine what that was like for her. Well Jamie did make it there, she got to be with Aaron. He was on life support and it wasn't looking good. Although I was devastated for my parents and our family my heart ached for Jamie and her kids.
Early in the morning the next day I decided to go home to try and get some sleep before taking my parents to the airport. It was starting to snow as I quickly walked home, thinking this was when I was going to start crying for sure. But I didn't. Instead I thought, I'm going to slip on this ice, I must look so silly running down the street in my slippers. I laughed out loud thinking, that's what Aaron would say if he were here. When I got home and crawled into bed with Ryan the tears finally came.

On February 26th after many tests it was determined that Aaron was in fact brain dead and would be taken off of life support. My parents found out while they were on a layover. They never made it to say goodbye to their son.
Many of us wore red and 49ers gear in honor of Aaron.
Aaron was able to donate many of his organs which saved many lives.

I had the tough job of calling each of my siblings to let them know our brother had died. 
So hard to believe that the brother I just saw, just hugged, just talked to was gone.
I'm so grateful for the time I got to spend with him recently.
I will always remember the last conversation I had with him. So positive, so happy.
I'll always remember our last hug :)
That whole day we had so many people reach out to all of us. From members of our ward, extended family and friends. Food, gifts and flowers were delivered. Thank you everyone!! It was so appreciated!
My phone died at least three times a day for a week. I had so many phone calls!

The next couple of days were kind of a blur. There were a lot of things to figure out from how to get everyone to the funeral, slideshows, programs, airline tickets, hotels, rental cars.. My poor parents were so distraught that left a lot on my shoulders and my sister Sarah's, something we were happy to do.
After several days of hibernation I had planned to go to the grocery store, but there was too much snow.

I'm so glad that I have these little ones to hug on. I'm so grateful I get to be their Mom. 

With my parents gone it was up to me to keep an eye on things here, including celebrating Anna's birthday. For some, life does go on.
Happy Birthday Anna!
While away it was also my Dad's birthday. I was able to work with the hotel to have 10 balloons delivered to his room, each with a name of all ten of his kids. Including Aaron's. 

I hadn't been to Wisconsin in 4 1/2 years! 
Anna, Neinah, Jacob and I flew together out to Madison where we rented a car and picked up a friend.
It was was so familiar yet so different. 
We just flew by Beaver Dam on our way up to Oshkosh.

We met up with everyone at a hotel not far from Jamie and Aaron's house in Oshkosh.

So many cousins

It was so nice to see Lucy and Benny.
Such sweet kids. So hard to think that they just lost their Daddy.
They were happy and seemed to be doing as well as can be expected. 
My parents had taken them to the dollar store where at checkout the clerk asking Benny about being with his Grandparents replied "My Dad just died."
I love these kids!! They are my connection to Aaron. They are a piece of him.
I hope that I can always maintain a good relationship with them and Jamie.

Ryan took off of work so I could go to Wisconsin. At the time I thought it better for him to stay at home with the children. Now I wish that he had come with me.
But he did a wonderful job with them. Ryan has been so supportive. He just lost his Mom three years ago, he know how it goes.

While I was gone he had to be Mr. Mom including going to parent teacher conferences.
He got to babies all dressed and ready. Including hair and jewelry ;)
Very impressed!

Aaron's funeral was AMAZING!
I couldn't believe how many people came! As I sat in the church building and looked back it was completely full all the way to the back. So many people he touched!! So many people who loved him!!
Jamie's Dad spoke. He reminded all of us that life is eternal, that Aaron keeps living and that we will see him again. My Dad got up to speak. He couldn't look up at the congregation for a minute, but when he did he felt proud. So many people coming to show their love and support for Aaron and his family. He talked about Aaron and how he was such a wonderful son. A son anyone would dream of having. Aaron was handsome, talented, smart, funny, hardworking and loving. 
He was always there to lend a hard or tell you when you were being stupid.
He loved his family and friends and would do anything for them. He was always upbeat and positive, always looking on the bright side. He was always happy. He loved candy, cereal, babies and the 49ers. He loved being outside and playing sports. He was good at everything, yet he was humble. He could tease you and then make you feel so good about yourself. He loved his wife and his children. He took care of them and always tried to do his best. He loved the gospel and serving the Lord.
One of my favorite parts of the funeral was when Jamie's cousin got up to sing. He sang Beyonce- Halo. At first it seemed weird, but really it was beautiful! It was for Jamie. Aaron is her angel now.
The burial seemed so final. I didn't go to the viewing. It's not that I didn't think I could handle it, I just didn't want that to be my last memory with Aaron. My last time with him was so wonderful, I want to remember him like that.
Nobody is ever prepared for losing a husband, I can't imagine losing Ryan. Jamie handled everything with such poise and grace. She's so strong!! I loved chatting with her at the cemetery about how well she was handling everything and how wonderful she looked to which she responded "Like my gloves and glasses? So Jackie O right?!" She's a tough lady and she will get through this!!





Grandpa Doug gave the dedicatory prayer. Sweet Lucy and Benny, I doubt they truly understand and grasp what's happening.
Uncle Adam playing with Benny, the boy without a Father. So heartbreaking. Lucy wanted to take the flowers.

So innocent. He will never know his Daddy. He's so young I doubt he will remember Aaron.
I love and hate this picture of my Dad. Saying goodbye to his oldest son and pride and joy for the last time.

Each of us siblings took Aaron's death differently and some had a harder time then others at the funeral. Overall it was a good bonding experience for all of us.

Finally Adam couldn't take it anymore. Little brothers always look up to their big brothers. Aaron was Adams example and hero. I think that Adam and Sarah have been the siblings who have suffered the most. To Adam Aaron was the big brother he always looked up to and for Sarah Aaron was her baby who she always looked out for. I looked up to Aaron too.

It was so nice to see so many old friends who I hadn't seen in so many years. Thank you everyone for your support! 



After the burial we went over to the church building where Jamie had lunch for everyone. Aaron hated potlucks so Jamie served Qdoba, a place Aaron loved to eat. Aaron served his mission in Jamaica so there was reggae music too.  It was wonderful to see everyone and talk about Aaron.




Dad stood and watched the slideshow for a long time.
I think it's going to be a long time for Dad to feel even a little better.
The bottom left is Aaron's best friend and the bottom right his friends and coworkers.
Jamie's cousin who sang at the funeral and her brother Brian and his wife Emily.
Jamie's Dad and step-mom. Jacob and his best friend Emily.

Lucy, it's been hard to internalize everything I'm sure. But she seems to be doing well. 


Mary, Sarah, Elizabeth (Bizzy) and me.
 After the funeral we had a family dinner where we talked about and remembered Aaron.
He will always be in our vocabulary. He will always be a part of our family.
We will just miss him, until we see him again.
I'm so thankful for my testimony of the gospel and of eternal life.
With that I can be strong.

Some pictures of Aaron..







One of the last pictures I ever took of him.



Goodbye Aaron. I will always remember you and love you forever.

Aaron Matthew Orr passed away on February 26, 2015, with his wife Jamie by his side, due to a severe brain injury sustained in a snowboarding accident. He was a seasoned snowboarder and had been wearing a helmet.

Aaron was born November 25, 1985 in Sacramento, California, to Matthew and Kimberly Orr. He was their third child. He would soon be joined by seven more brothers and sisters. The family moved to Beaver Dam, Wisconsin in 1998, a farm they would call home for many years. Aaron was an active child and daredevil who enjoyed many sports as early as five years old. He graduated from Beaver Dam High School, where he was a member of the track and football teams. He had a kind heart, often taking the blame for something one of his siblings had done, or comforting team mates when mistakes were made.

Aaron served as a missionary for the LDS church in Jamaica. He then met and married Jamie Christensen in 2006. They worked hard to finish their college degrees, and had three beautiful children who were and are their pride & joy. Aaron was a devoted father and husband who always found time to show his children fun and love, and was adored by both them and his wife.

Aaron graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Oshkosh with a degree in Computer Science. He was in the beginning stages of a successful career as a software developer at JJ Keller in Neenah, Wisconsin, and was admired by co-workers for his humor and leadership abilities. He was involved in his community, spending countless hours with youth groups as a scout and church leader.

Known for his intelligence, good nature, and uncanny ability to tease his friends, family and co-workers, Aaron touched many lives and will always be remembered.

Aaron was an organ donor, and his passing has already provided life-saving transplants to many in need. He is survived by his wife Jamie, his children Lucy (7), Benny (4) and Elenora (4 months); his parents Matthew and Kimberly Orr; grandparents Douglas and Delores Lewis and Bill and Peggy Mashburn; nine siblings; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and in-laws.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, March 7th at 11:00 a.m. at the LDS Church in Neenah, Wisconsin (115 Castle Oak Drive). Visiting hours will be held prior to the funeral, beginning at 9:00 a.m. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to college funds for the children. Donations can be made at www.gofundme.com/na8v80 (the Aaron Orr Memorial Family Fund.) - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thenorthwestern/obituary.aspx?pid=174300713#sthash.UeR11QOY.dpuf
Aaron Matthew Orr passed away on February 26, 2015, with his wife Jamie by his side, due to a severe brain injury sustained in a snowboarding accident. He was a seasoned snowboarder and had been wearing a helmet.

Aaron was born November 25, 1985 in Sacramento, California, to Matthew and Kimberly Orr. He was their third child. He would soon be joined by seven more brothers and sisters. The family moved to Beaver Dam, Wisconsin in 1998, a farm they would call home for many years. Aaron was an active child and daredevil who enjoyed many sports as early as five years old. He graduated from Beaver Dam High School, where he was a member of the track and football teams. He had a kind heart, often taking the blame for something one of his siblings had done, or comforting team mates when mistakes were made.

Aaron served as a missionary for the LDS church in Jamaica. He then met and married Jamie Christensen in 2006. They worked hard to finish their college degrees, and had three beautiful children who were and are their pride & joy. Aaron was a devoted father and husband who always found time to show his children fun and love, and was adored by both them and his wife.

Aaron graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Oshkosh with a degree in Computer Science. He was in the beginning stages of a successful career as a software developer at JJ Keller in Neenah, Wisconsin, and was admired by co-workers for his humor and leadership abilities. He was involved in his community, spending countless hours with youth groups as a scout and church leader.

Known for his intelligence, good nature, and uncanny ability to tease his friends, family and co-workers, Aaron touched many lives and will always be remembered.

Aaron was an organ donor, and his passing has already provided life-saving transplants to many in need. He is survived by his wife Jamie, his children Lucy (7), Benny (4) and Elenora (4 months); his parents Matthew and Kimberly Orr; grandparents Douglas and Delores Lewis and Bill and Peggy Mashburn; nine siblings; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and in-laws.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, March 7th at 11:00 a.m. at the LDS Church in Neenah, Wisconsin (115 Castle Oak Drive). Visiting hours will be held prior to the funeral, beginning at 9:00 a.m. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to college funds for the children. Donations can be made at www.gofundme.com/na8v80 (the Aaron Orr Memorial Family Fund.) - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thenorthwestern/obituary.aspx?pid=174300713#sthash.UeR11QOY.dpuf
Aaron Matthew Orr passed away on February 26, 2015, with his wife Jamie by his side, due to a severe brain injury sustained in a snowboarding accident. He was a seasoned snowboarder and had been wearing a helmet.

Aaron was born November 25, 1985 in Sacramento, California, to Matthew and Kimberly Orr. He was their third child. He would soon be joined by seven more brothers and sisters. The family moved to Beaver Dam, Wisconsin in 1998, a farm they would call home for many years. Aaron was an active child and daredevil who enjoyed many sports as early as five years old. He graduated from Beaver Dam High School, where he was a member of the track and football teams. He had a kind heart, often taking the blame for something one of his siblings had done, or comforting team mates when mistakes were made.

Aaron served as a missionary for the LDS church in Jamaica. He then met and married Jamie Christensen in 2006. They worked hard to finish their college degrees, and had three beautiful children who were and are their pride & joy. Aaron was a devoted father and husband who always found time to show his children fun and love, and was adored by both them and his wife.

Aaron graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Oshkosh with a degree in Computer Science. He was in the beginning stages of a successful career as a software developer at JJ Keller in Neenah, Wisconsin, and was admired by co-workers for his humor and leadership abilities. He was involved in his community, spending countless hours with youth groups as a scout and church leader.

Known for his intelligence, good nature, and uncanny ability to tease his friends, family and co-workers, Aaron touched many lives and will always be remembered.

Aaron was an organ donor, and his passing has already provided life-saving transplants to many in need. He is survived by his wife Jamie, his children Lucy (7), Benny (4) and Elenora (4 months); his parents Matthew and Kimberly Orr; grandparents Douglas and Delores Lewis and Bill and Peggy Mashburn; nine siblings; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and in-laws.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, March 7th at 11:00 a.m. at the LDS Church in Neenah, Wisconsin (115 Castle Oak Drive). Visiting hours will be held prior to the funeral, beginning at 9:00 a.m. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to college funds for the children. Donations can be made at www.gofundme.com/na8v80 (the Aaron Orr Memorial Family Fund.) - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thenorthwestern/obituary.aspx?pid=174300713#sthash.UeR11QOY.dpuf
Aaron Matthew Orr passed away on February 26, 2015, with his wife Jamie by his side, due to a severe brain injury sustained in a snowboarding accident. He was a seasoned snowboarder and had been wearing a helmet.

Aaron was born November 25, 1985 in Sacramento, California, to Matthew and Kimberly Orr. He was their third child. He would soon be joined by seven more brothers and sisters. The family moved to Beaver Dam, Wisconsin in 1998, a farm they would call home for many years. Aaron was an active child and daredevil who enjoyed many sports as early as five years old. He graduated from Beaver Dam High School, where he was a member of the track and football teams. He had a kind heart, often taking the blame for something one of his siblings had done, or comforting team mates when mistakes were made.

Aaron served as a missionary for the LDS church in Jamaica. He then met and married Jamie Christensen in 2006. They worked hard to finish their college degrees, and had three beautiful children who were and are their pride & joy. Aaron was a devoted father and husband who always found time to show his children fun and love, and was adored by both them and his wife.

Aaron graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Oshkosh with a degree in Computer Science. He was in the beginning stages of a successful career as a software developer at JJ Keller in Neenah, Wisconsin, and was admired by co-workers for his humor and leadership abilities. He was involved in his community, spending countless hours with youth groups as a scout and church leader.

Known for his intelligence, good nature, and uncanny ability to tease his friends, family and co-workers, Aaron touched many lives and will always be remembered.

Aaron was an organ donor, and his passing has already provided life-saving transplants to many in need. He is survived by his wife Jamie, his children Lucy (7), Benny (4) and Elenora (4 months); his parents Matthew and Kimberly Orr; grandparents Douglas and Delores Lewis and Bill and Peggy Mashburn; nine siblings; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and in-laws.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, March 7th at 11:00 a.m. at the LDS Church in Neenah, Wisconsin (115 Castle Oak Drive). Visiting hours will be held prior to the funeral, beginning at 9:00 a.m. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to college funds for the children. Donations can be made at www.gofundme.com/na8v80 (the Aaron Orr Memorial Family Fund.) - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thenorthwestern/obituary.aspx?pid=174300713#sthash.UeR11QOY.dpuf
Aaron Matthew Orr passed away on February 26, 2015, with his wife Jamie by his side, due to a severe brain injury sustained in a snowboarding accident. He was a seasoned snowboarder and had been wearing a helmet.

Aaron was born November 25, 1985 in Sacramento, California, to Matthew and Kimberly Orr. He was their third child. He would soon be joined by seven more brothers and sisters. The family moved to Beaver Dam, Wisconsin in 1998, a farm they would call home for many years. Aaron was an active child and daredevil who enjoyed many sports as early as five years old. He graduated from Beaver Dam High School, where he was a member of the track and football teams. He had a kind heart, often taking the blame for something one of his siblings had done, or comforting team mates when mistakes were made.

Aaron served as a missionary for the LDS church in Jamaica. He then met and married Jamie Christensen in 2006. They worked hard to finish their college degrees, and had three beautiful children who were and are their pride & joy. Aaron was a devoted father and husband who always found time to show his children fun and love, and was adored by both them and his wife.

Aaron graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Oshkosh with a degree in Computer Science. He was in the beginning stages of a successful career as a software developer at JJ Keller in Neenah, Wisconsin, and was admired by co-workers for his humor and leadership abilities. He was involved in his community, spending countless hours with youth groups as a scout and church leader.

Known for his intelligence, good nature, and uncanny ability to tease his friends, family and co-workers, Aaron touched many lives and will always be remembered.

Aaron was an organ donor, and his passing has already provided life-saving transplants to many in need. He is survived by his wife Jamie, his children Lucy (7), Benny (4) and Elenora (4 months); his parents Matthew and Kimberly Orr; grandparents Douglas and Delores Lewis and Bill and Peggy Mashburn; nine siblings; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and in-laws.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, March 7th at 11:00 a.m. at the LDS Church in Neenah, Wisconsin (115 Castle Oak Drive). Visiting hours will be held prior to the funeral, beginning at 9:00 a.m. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to college funds for the children. Donations can be made at www.gofundme.com/na8v80 (the Aaron Orr Memorial Family Fund.) - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thenorthwestern/obituary.aspx?pid=174300713#sthash.UeR11QOY.dpuf
Aaron Matthew Orr passed away on February 26, 2015, with his wife Jamie by his side, due to a severe brain injury sustained in a snowboarding accident. He was a seasoned snowboarder and had been wearing a helmet.

Aaron was born November 25, 1985 in Sacramento, California, to Matthew and Kimberly Orr. He was their third child. He would soon be joined by seven more brothers and sisters. The family moved to Beaver Dam, Wisconsin in 1998, a farm they would call home for many years. Aaron was an active child and daredevil who enjoyed many sports as early as five years old. He graduated from Beaver Dam High School, where he was a member of the track and football teams. He had a kind heart, often taking the blame for something one of his siblings had done, or comforting team mates when mistakes were made.

Aaron served as a missionary for the LDS church in Jamaica. He then met and married Jamie Christensen in 2006. They worked hard to finish their college degrees, and had three beautiful children who were and are their pride & joy. Aaron was a devoted father and husband who always found time to show his children fun and love, and was adored by both them and his wife.

Aaron graduated from the University of Wisconsin in Oshkosh with a degree in Computer Science. He was in the beginning stages of a successful career as a software developer at JJ Keller in Neenah, Wisconsin, and was admired by co-workers for his humor and leadership abilities. He was involved in his community, spending countless hours with youth groups as a scout and church leader.

Known for his intelligence, good nature, and uncanny ability to tease his friends, family and co-workers, Aaron touched many lives and will always be remembered.

Aaron was an organ donor, and his passing has already provided life-saving transplants to many in need. He is survived by his wife Jamie, his children Lucy (7), Benny (4) and Elenora (4 months); his parents Matthew and Kimberly Orr; grandparents Douglas and Delores Lewis and Bill and Peggy Mashburn; nine siblings; and many nieces, nephews, cousins and in-laws.

Funeral services will be held on Saturday, March 7th at 11:00 a.m. at the LDS Church in Neenah, Wisconsin (115 Castle Oak Drive). Visiting hours will be held prior to the funeral, beginning at 9:00 a.m. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to college funds for the children. Donations can be made at www.gofundme.com/na8v80 (the Aaron Orr Memorial Family Fund.) - See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thenorthwestern/obituary.aspx?pid=174300713#sthash.UeR11QOY.dpuf

1 comment:

Karla said...

So well done and beautiful, Rachel! You are amazing!!!

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